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Browsing Category United States

Far From Harm That Happened Close to Home

April 16, 2013 · by Nikki

Almost two years ago, I arrived in Paris, ready to embark on a new adventure. During my first few weeks here, it was the National Hockey League (NHL) playoffs back home in the states, and my home town team, the Boston Bruins, had made it to the finals. My hockey allegiances had been split in college between the NJ Devils (after following a certain player that helped them to a Stanley Cup win), and the Bruins, whom I had watched on TV as a kid, and had seen a few times at the Garden with my Dad.

The Boston Bruins went on to win the Stanley Cup that year, and I experienced something interesting: pride in the place where I come from, that was actually heightened by distance (and a love of sports). I wrote about it, here, and was happy to wear some New England sports attire to work that day (it was a Red Sox jersey, since I didn’t have anything Bruins). Although I smiled on my walk to work, proudly displaying my Red Sox gear, I knew my clothing would only signal “Boston” to those who were American, but I didn’t care. I was expressing myself just because I was happy and proud to be from New England, not because I cared if anyone else could see what I was doing, or to prove my fandom (because trust me, I know some super serious hockey fans, and I don’t rank among them).

Me and my Dad at a Sox game, and the Red Sox shirt I wore to celebrate the Bruins
Me and my Dad at a Sox game, and the Red Sox jersey I wore to celebrate the Bruins

Today, I’m doing something that is simultaneously very similar, yet very different to that day in June. Today, I’m also wearing something Bostonian, to show my pride, and not because I care who can see me or if they recognize the green color and signature leprechaun that represent the Celtics. But the pride I express today is a different one. This is the kind of pride I don’t want to have to express, the kind that is caused by things we always think happen to someone else. This is a quiet, pensive pride, where support means thinking about all of the people who have been hurt or have lost someone in an explosion that rocked an otherwise awesome event, and counting my blessings.

Funny how pride can exist in two different forms, despite being tied to the same thing.

Two friends and I, prepping for one of Boston's infamous Duck Tour before my grand departure to Paris
Two friends and I, prepping for one of Boston’s infamous Duck Tours before my grand departure to Paris

So here’s to you, Boston, and all the people who make the city as strong as it is. Like the emergency personnel and the race volunteers that I saw on the news who were rushing to the aid of the injured, like the former Patriots player who was seen carrying an injured woman, and like the rest of the city who I know will support one another every step of the way. I am far away from the danger that has transpired, but never too far to be proud of Boston and to show my support for the city that myself and so many other New Englanders call “ours.”

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Interview with an Expat – Part 2

December 7, 2012 · by Nikki

As a follow up to yesterday’s post containing the first half of the interview, the rest of the “interview” is below (and if you’re seeing this for the first time, check out the Part 1 of this interview here):

Do you get homesick?

 Another “yes and no.” I don’t get homesick in the sense of just wishing I could go home, or missing things to the point that I can’t enjoy my current surroundings. But there are events that happen: births, weddings, get-togethers… and I miss them all. Not to mention the events that I have in my life that my friends and family don’t get to be a part of. Plus I really miss my dog, Reese. She’s very well-taken care of, and I know that, but man I miss that silly, sweet, brown pup.

Hard to get home sick when you get to go scooting through Rome

Hard to get home sick when you get to go scooting through Rome

Do you take every experience like it’s just temporary?

I think sometimes I do, yes. I try and enjoy what I’m experiencing, for sure, but I sort of have this voice in the back of my head telling me that I don’t know how long this will last. It’s good in a way; it makes me try to see and do all that I can while I’m here. But sometimes I also feel like I’m some kind of tourist-at-all-times, never interacting in great depth with the various elements in my life.

Are you scared of having to come back?

This is a tough one. I don’t know. When I came back from studying in South Africa for 3.5 months, I had extreme reverse culture shock. The adjustment was really hard for me. I don’t think that French culture is so different from the what I was living previously that I would experience that again, but I wonder about the possible long-term negative effects I might experience.

I also feel like I’ve come to think of a lot of aspects of life in Paris as endearing, though city life in general is much grittier than what I’ve experienced in small towns and suburbs. There are cities, and then there are cities. And I think if I came back, I’d need to find a place that kept me in a continuous state of wonder and awe. It doesn’t have to be another city, but it does have to have magic.

Do you feel like you’ve accomplished something by experiencing life in another country?

Not yet. I feel like I’m not finished here. First of all, I don’t speak French as well as I would like (though I’m proud to announce that I no longer say “I don’t speak French,” and now I just say “I’m not fluent in French” because dangit, I can say a lot!). Second of all, I think there’s more to gain from living and working in another country than what I’ve gotten at this point.

Do you think that everyone should experience living abroad?

No. I don’t think it’s for everyone. I have some friends who are so close with friends or family that even vacations make them nervous, and as much as I think people should try, there are plenty who would not thrive when living outside of their comfort zones. But I do think that most people don’t even know where their boundaries of comfort lie, and living abroad can be a very positive eye-opener. I think people should at least travel to other countries, and if it appeals to someone enough, they should give being an expat a try, even if it’s only temporary.

What other questions do people want to know about the life of an expat? Are some of you out there considering making the leap? What weighs on your mind?

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Interview with an Expat – Part 1

December 6, 2012 · by Nikki

Maybe it’s presumptuous to post an interview that features me, but I’ve gone and done it anyway.

An old friend (as in long-time, not as in aged-like-fine-wine) and I were talking about what people would want to know from my blog. What things would be of interest to tourists? What things would a visitor to Paris or France want to know? And then the question came up: what things do you want to know about the life of an expat?

expat passport

My friend came up with so many great questions, that I’ve decided to share the “interview” with you in two parts. Without further ado, I present you with her first set of very interesting questions about living life abroad, and my responses:

What does it feel like to live abroad, emotionally?

Most of the time, it feels kind of normal. At this point, anyway. I’ve got a great little network of friends, there is routine in terms of when I am able to make contact with friends and family from home, and I find myself still thinking about work too much, and personal things too little. There are definitely times when I feel isolated, like in groups where the conversation flows so fast that I can’t keep up or participate. Or when I’m up on a Saturday morning and thinking of someone from home and they’re still fast asleep…

It is also challenging, when things that were simple before are now a struggle (buying groceries, having your washing machine fixed, being allowed to live where you live). Emotionally, you either get worn down or put up war-like defenses to prepare you for the semi-constant rejection.

But on the whole, things are starting to feel familiar, and the experience is very rewarding. I often look back and realize that I am able to do things now that I couldn’t a year ago, and that feeling is worth all the emotional turmoil.

Do people think this is a phase?

Yes and no. Some people, like my Dad, say things like “I bet you’ll never come back,” and other people ask me “when are you coming home?” every time I see them, as if it’s guaranteed that I’ll return to the States. Though I do think that the more time passes with me living here, plus the addition of an amazing French boyfriend into the equation, has people expecting an imminent return less and less.

How are you treated as an American?

Not badly, at all. Actually here, believe it or not, people often can’t hear the difference between an American or British accent (though I’ve met a Frenchie, who coincidentally lives in London, who swears he can, haha), so a lot of times people realize I’m a native English speaker, but not necessarily that I’m American. Usually the first reaction upon learning my nationality is to ask where I’m from, and then to tell me some place in the States they either have been, or would like to go. Then, they always want to know what I think of France. 🙂 I often hear things like “Really? You came all the way to Paris from the US?” or “Wow! I’ve never met an American before!” And on the whole, there isn’t as much negativity towards Americans as there used to be.

Are you afraid to settle in too much since you aren’t a citizen?

Not really. My attitude is that I don’t know what’s around the corner, and I want to be open-minded and willing to go where life takes me. That means that maybe an opportunity will come up in another area, or maybe I’ll decide to apply for citizenship in France. I’ll do what feels right when it comes to making life decisions, and if that means settling in to some place here in France, that’s just what I’ll do.

Check back tomorrow, for the conclusion of my little mock interview. 🙂

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Be the Change

November 7, 2012 · by Nikki

Time to break the radio silence.

By special request, a Facebook status I posted earlier today in reference to the American Presidential election, which concluded yesterday, is here in blog form, ready to be shared:

So everyone is complaining about people’s reaction to the elections and pleading for people to stop posting about politics, but since I’ve kept relatively quiet during the election season, I apologetically use this moment to share my 2 cents:

Just like 2 parents can love the same child but have different thoughts on the best way to raise that child, the two men who ran for President of the United States this year have two different ideas about the best path for the future of our country–and both love our nation, as both parents love the child. So please, don’t consider one more or less American or patriotic than the other, and the same holds true for their followers/voters.

Now if YOU have a solution about the economy, jobs, the debt, foreign policy or any other area that you feel like the winner of yesterday’s election cannot accomplish, than your civic duty is NOT OVER. Voting IS NOT ENOUGH. If you have a solution or an idea, you need to WRITE to your local representatives and demand the change you want to see! We all want to see change, but we need to be the force that drives the change. Please, do not sit back and rejoice that the guy you voted for won, and think you don’t need to be involved in moving the country forward. Conversely, do not sit back and complain that the guy you voted for lost, and think the next four years are also lost.

I, personally, put the rights of my fellow Americans first and foremost when I make the choice to vote, because the United States were founded by people (immigrants) who wanted equality and were trying to escape oppression. If and when these items get resolved to the point where everyone is equal under American law, you will very likely see me give my vote go to the other side of the aisle. But until we can move forward in the direction of equality for ALL citizens of my country, I will continue to vote this way. And my work is not over. I will not just cast my vote and kick my feet up. There is more to be done, and I intend to participate… even from France.

The president is one man. The government is comprised of a tiny percentage of our population. WE are the people of the United States of America. We can, and NEED to, be the change.

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France v USA: Competition of Olympic Proportions

August 2, 2012 · by Nikki

Competitive? Yes I am.

And I’m not afraid to admit that I’m generally a sore loser. Yeah, that’s right, I said it: I don’t like to lose. So what?

Now that the Olympics are on, I get to be vicariously competitive by watching sports that are rarely highlighted on (inter)national television. It’s great. And I get to watch everything right from the heart of the United States’ biggest rivals.

No, I’m not in China! Oh wait, they’re our biggest Olympic rivals? Well, not when you’re an American living in France. In my world, it’s “China Schmina.” Yes, I want us to win the medal race and watch my compatriots rise to Olympic glory, but what I really enjoy is when we beat the French.

Unfair advantage rooting for the US, you say? Try telling that to the US men’s 4X100 relay swim team, who were leading the race until two things happened: the amazing Yannick Agnel got into the pool for the final leg of the relay, and my dear friend Courtney (who, despite the following blunder, is cool, so check out her blog) said the dreaded words “there’s no way France is going to beat us now,” after which we were swiftly ousted from the gold medal position. Thank you both. 🙂

Okay, silver’s not all that bad. And they look pretty happy. But still! (Rob Schumacher-USA TODAY Sports)

My only consolation was that earlier in the day, the US men’s basketball team trampled France to win by a nearly 30-point margin.

Sorry TP
(image by Bob Donnan, USA TODAY Sports)

Maybe I’m just being a brat (it wouldn’t be at all out of character for me), but YOU try sitting in a room full of French people who cheer heartily against your homeland. You’d forget about China, too.

And no, this isn’t just nationalistic ignorance where I spew that the United States is the best country in the world, or some other silly nonsense. But just like the New England Patriots are my team, when it comes to the Olympics, the US is my team.

Okay and maaaaybe I admit that when the US isn’t competing, I might support France. Allez! 🙂

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Home Sweet Box of Home

May 4, 2012 · by Nikki

Dorothy went through some pretty badass trials and tribulations in order to learn that “there’s no place like home.” Fortunately for me, there was no Wicked Witch to drench, no poppies to overcome, no flying monkeys in pursuit, and certainly no egomaniacal old man trying to masquerade as some omnipotent being with an over-sized green head. All I did was open a box. Well, technically two boxes.

Apparently, to my delight, two of my best friends from home decided to get together and send me some of my favorite things (not surprisingly, most of the items were food). As soon as I opened the package, it was as if I had clicked my heels three times. I was immediately transported away from the City of Lights, away from the Eiffel Tower, away from the Seine, and back to a familiar place filled with the faces of people I know.

Click, click, click…

It’s true that since I moved abroad I often feel like my home is somewhere in between here and there (and sometimes I feel like it’s nowhere). But, there’s nothing like a few little things put together with care to make you remember what “home” is supposed to feel like. I love my friends, I love my family, and it’s thanks to them that I can continue being a Perpetual Passenger and maintain any trace of sanity. Thanks to everyone who plays a part, large or small. It doesn’t go unnoticed.

Image copyright: FIDM museum shop

An Update and a Confession

April 10, 2012 · by Nikki

I have been lazy. And this isn’t even the confessional part of this post. I probably shouldn’t reveal this little secret, but the truth is that most of the posts I publish have usually been written days, and sometimes even weeks, before they reach your eyes. I’m sure this isn’t unusual, but the point is that when I published all of my pre-drafted posts, I didn’t write any new ones. So the last month has been a rather boring one here at Perpetual Passenger, and I intend to change that. 🙂

This was me being lazy last year. Apparently it happens often.

First, I’ll start with an update on things that have transpired that I’ve yet to write about (but will do so in more depth in the very near future):

  • I went to Tokyo! Whoohoo! I have my little city review and a bunch of pictures to share with you.
  • I’m taking French lessons again! This makes for great inspiration for the quirky little language differences that I’m discovering, most of which will give you a good laugh.
  • I had a birthday! This is kind of old news, but actually the inch closer that I have moved toward 30 continually generates some new thoughts (read: crazy thoughts) that might be mildly entertaining to some of you.
  • I got a haircut! Yeah, very mundane. But the cut is pseudo-drastic, and most of my friends and family haven’t even seen it yet. Plus, switching up my style from time to time can be refreshing, and it has a way of motivating me.
  • I went to a concert! Love her or hate her, Florence and her Machine kick ass live.

Apart from this stuff, I’ve also decided that, although I am an American in Paris–which seems to be a fairly common situation that people have either lived and want to remember, are living right now and can relate to, or have never lived but fantasize about–which gives me lots of Paris-focused things about which to write, this blog started as a travel blog. I plan to keep writing about my life in France and all of the craziness that comes along with it, but also to try and remember the roots of this thing and include more about the places I go. I went to Prague for the first time and all you got were pictures! Sheesh. I should fire myself and hire a new writer. 🙂

And now for the confession.

I make no effort to hide that there are certain things from the US that I miss, but some of the things I miss are more embarrassing than others. Today I have been hit by the addictive force that is Mac and Cheese. I haven’t had it, or anything like it, in close to 10 months now, and a craving has come over me like a tidal wave. Don’t get me wrong–I didn’t eat a that much mac and cheese when I was in the States. But there are some things that you want simply because you can’t have them. I guess that’s how mac and cheese has re-entered my life. I preferred Annie’s Organic Shells and Cheddar, with a little tuna and some peas (Yum! More like a casserole than a dish of pasta covered in processed dairy…) and I think I’m going to crack, and… yes… maybe…

GO TO THE AMERICAN GROCERY STORE IN PARIS AND BUY SOME!

Oh gosh that was painful. I’ve already written about missing mac and cheese, and how most French people I know feel about it, here. But you should know, dear reader, that I am braving nothing less than ostracism by consuming such a dish here in Paris. You should have seen Frog Prince’s face when I told him this morning that I wanted some mac and cheese! It was like I had told him I wanted to eat a bowl of earth worms. But maybe I can convince him to make some from scratch at home (I know you’re reading this, B. Come on! Home made mac and cheese is awesome and you’re the best chef I know!!! 🙂 ). In any case, I need to get some soon or I might just lose my mind.

So there you have it… a glimpse of the posts that are to come, and a juicy confession to snicker about. I hope it was as good for you as it was for me.

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An American (Football Fan) In Paris

January 17, 2012 · by Nikki

In one of my earlier posts, A New England Sports Fan Abroad, I wrote about what it was like to miss championship games because of my international antics. But after several Sundays spent at The Great Canadian–a Canadian bar (surprise!) that airs NFL games here in Paris–I can, thankfully, write about what it’s like to watch a game abroad.

One of the first things I thought about when I decided to accept the offer to work for my current company and make the move to Paris was how I would be able to watch my beloved New England Patriots every Sunday. When I lived in the States, I made a point to go to at least one home game every season (last year I upped it to two, in light of my imminent departure), and if I wasn’t at Gillette I was surely glued to a TV somewhere. I’ve definitely had to miss my fair share of games, though, and that wasn’t an occurrence I wished to become a regularity.

The 2011 season, however, was a whole different ball game–pun intended. Not only have I been traveling more (admittedly both for business and for pleasure), but I am of course living in a country where American football isn’t exactly the most popular sport around. If you ask the locals if they’re into football you’ll likely hear a resounding yes, but they’re certainly not talking about tossing the ol’ pigskin. And as if there weren’t enough obstacles to watching a sport in a country that predominantly couldn’t care less about it, I also have to deal with the six to nine hour time difference for watching games taking place in the US–arguably the most difficult element to work around.

Fortunately for me, I was referred to TGC by a fellow American expat and blogger, Michael (you can check out his blog here), and his recommendation couldn’t have been better. Not only have I been able to watch several games during the regular season, but this past weekend I was able to watch the game that turned out to be our first playoff victory since January 20, 2008. This is particularly amazing considering that the game began at a staggering  2am Paris time Saturday night/Sunday morning. Thankfully, TGC came through and stayed open for the entire game, not-so-gently kicking us out at 5:30am. I was able to catch this crucial match-up, share drinks with friends, and make it home on the metro just before the sun came up.

Just for fun, here are some pictures of myself and some friends during the course of the season at our favorite American football hangout:

The gang, dedicated and pulling an almost-all-nighter for our team!
Me on Christmas Eve cheering for the Patriots to pull ahead of the Dophins!
First Patriots game at TGC!

With Esteve/Paul/Alfonso and the Frog Prince!
With beautiful Melissa on my very first trip to TGC to check it out 🙂

It’s been a great season so far, but I’m looking forward to what comes next as the Patriots compete against Baltimore for the AFC Championship title! And thank you, TGC, for giving me a little piece of home every Sunday. Now for next week: Let’s kick some Baltimore butt, boys!

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Becoming an Anti-Anti-American

January 5, 2012 · by Nikki

You know what I hate? Encountering obnoxious Americans when I’m traveling and living abroad. Obnoxious anyone, for that matter.

Image credit: isabellasnow.hubpages.com

You know what I hate even more? Encountering Americans who are traveling and living abroad slamming other Americans.

It’s true that at one point I was a bit reluctant to associate myself with Americans while traveling. I’m sure a lot of you have heard the advice “Tell everyone you’re Canadian when you travel” due to the seemingly overwhelming unpopularity of Americans when visiting countries other than their own. I’ve never fibbed about my nationality, but there have certainly been times when I’ve cringed at the stories I’ve heard about loud Americans in bars, rude Americans in restaurants, or Americans asking some really ridiculous questions (like, “Do French people use toilet paper?” COME ON PEOPLE!).

However, imagine if, in the history of the world, every single person who was ever something unpopular turned on their own kind and shunned who they are. What exactly would our global society look like if every person who had stood up to someone saying that their race/ethnicity/religion/nationality wasn’t worth defending simply agreed with whatever negativity surrounded them at the time and faded away?

So to all of my fellow Americans who are living or traveling abroad, here’s an idea: if you find yourself constantly annoyed by Americans, instead of jumping to insult them, why not try leading by example? Be the better tourist/expat, and change the opinion people have of us. Change can start with one person, so maybe it’s time for each of us to be that person. And you never know, maybe in a few years the American-abroad reputation will be so much improved that Canadians will be wearing stars and stripes on their backpacks the next time they take a Euro-trip. 🙂

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I’m a Writer!

January 2, 2012 · by Nikki

Okay, not really. BUT – I did get asked to contribute to an ezine called MyFrenchLife. I said yes and my first article was recently published. You can read it here.

I’ll be writing at least one article a month, and I’ll be sure to link to my writing on MyFrenchLife over here. You know, because you are all DYING to read more of my writing. 😉

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