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Hi. My name is Nikki and I am an addict.

August 21, 2012 · by Nikki

Addiction is a very serious thing.

The Collins English Dictionary defines addiction as follows: the condition of being abnormally dependent on some habit.

I am publishing, for the first time ever, that I am an addict. I am taking the first step, with all of you as my witnesses, to end my addiction. I’m asking for the help of my friends, my family, and any other readers out there to join me in my well-overdue, virtual intervention.

I am addicted to excuses.

For the past 15 months, I have been living in France, and I don’t speak (much) French. And until now, I have been dependent on the habit of excuses, which have enabled me to continue my life in this way. Here are the tools I have been using to sell myself short:

  • I work in English
  • I don’t know enough grammar yet
  • I don’t know enough vocabulary
  • I don’t want to sound stupid
  • I’m afraid of making mistakes
  • I don’t want people to laugh at me when I speak
  • I can’t express myself fully

And on, and on.

This is the moment where I am airing my dirty laundry, admitting my fault, and holding myself accountable to all of you.

I have reblogged something from Sojourning Abroad that has served as my wake-up call. You can read it, here. The video in this post has highlighted for me that my excuses, not my lack of knowledge, are the reasons I do not speak French yet, and has given me the sense to understand my next steps. Thanks in advance to everyone for helping to end my addiction to excuses. It’s time to come clean and speak French!

If you can, take the time to watch the video posted by Sojourning Abroad in this post. Maybe you, too, can find the motivation to learn another language!

48.868711 2.417708

Why I Think You SHOULD Have to Press 1 for English

August 16, 2012 · by Nikki

About a year or so before moving to Paris, I was driving down the road and saw this gem of a bumper sticker:

“Patriotic” or pathetic?
image copyright: zazzle.com

I was offended even then, because I happen to think it’s a very close-minded view surrounding language (regardless of your views on immigration control, multi-language support should be a no-brainer). But a recent event has brought me back to my thoughts on this lovely little message.

Most of the time I’m able to get by in Paris without being reminded of the fact that I’m an outsider, but every so often it gets thrust into my face. This weekend, while talking with Frog prince as we readied ourselves for a game of tennis, I heard a gruff voice sharply say “Speak French!” I looked up to see the man on the court next to ours staring at me. He was startled by the fact that I stared back (in disbelief, on my part), and raised a hand to say, unconvincingly, “I’m just joking,” and continued on with his match.

His shocking outburst got me thinking: Of course I think it’s important to learn the local language when you relocate to a new country. So much so, that I would recommend requiring immigrants to take some form of structured language courses as a mandatory part of the immigration process. But if I am having a private conversation with someone, how dare you tell me that I should have that conversation in any other language than the one I choose?!W hen interacting on a business level (at shops, ordering food, at the post office, etc.), I make all efforts to go French or go home. But even if I were perfectly fluent in French, there’s a good chance I would still be speaking in English, at least most of the time, to my boyfriend, since that’s how our relationship got started.

At that moment, I suddenly remembered that gloriously inconsiderate bumper sticker I saw so long ago, and I asked myself: when people hear someone speaking a foreign language, do they assume that they can’t speak the local one? Has it occurred to people that someone speaking, Spanish, for example, might also speak English? Have we forgotten what it means to support each other? Is offering a telephone menu in more than one language really un-American? Because, last time I checked, it was the contrary…

A more comical approach to the dialing debate 🙂
copyright: memegenerator.net

Until you’ve lived the life of an immigrant making efforts to learn a new local language, you can’t truly know the struggles that such a process encompasses. Remember that just because someone is an immigrant or is speaking a language other than the local one, that they probably ARE making efforts to learn, and may already be pretty well-versed in this new language. This doesn’t eliminate the benefits of offering multiple languages on phone menus, and if you’re an English-speaker, it certainly doesn’t hinder your phone experience. So thanks, most US businesses, for offering those often English-speaking immigrants the option to do some important things over the phone in their native tongue. We are not as ignorant a country as we may seem…

48.868711 2.417708

Friday the 13th – No Horrors Here

July 13, 2012 · by Nikki

Friday the 13th. An unlucky day? A lucky day?

Whatever your belief, you probably at least know that there is some stigma attached to this particular date.

I, personally, believe a lot in creating your own luck, and in karma. Whatever forces that drive our days, it is sure that some days leave you wishing you could crawl back into bed, while others have you hurrying to your local convenience store to buy some lottery tickets.

On this specific Friday the 13th, I seem to be having a lucky day.

As of now, I am the proud holder of my first carte de sejour (the thing I need to continue living and working in France since my visa has expired). Let’s pay no attention to the fact that I need to start the renewal process next week (no joke), and temporarily rejoice at the relative ease with which I have attained this little gem.

Almost as if to congratulate me, I saw this boat of military men and women cheering down the river immediately after receiving my carte de sejour…

Perhaps my luck will run out at some point, but for now, I’m chalking this up as a win. Friday the 13th? My lucky day, indeed (so everyone playing Euromillions can just give up now). 🙂

What other lucky/unlucky charms are there? I want to hear’em all!

48.868711 2.417708

France Brings Out The American In Me

January 30, 2012 · by Nikki

Copyright Rollingstone.com

The latest article I wrote for MyFrenchLife was published today, and you can read it here.

Enjoy! 🙂

48.868711 2.417708

A Teaser!

December 14, 2011 · by Nikki

Guess what I’m doing this week?!

FRENCH LESSONS!

And guess what I need to post about ASAP?!

MOROCCO!

Pictures and updates to come. Hold tight 😉

48.868711 2.417708

Spotted: Politeness in Paris

November 16, 2011 · by Nikki

Parisians are known all over the world for their less-than-courteous ways. I was once told “One of the best things about France is Paris. One of the worst things about Paris are the Parisians.”

In fact, a study was done among non-Parisian French residents to understand their feelings on the capital-dwellers. The results showed that 68% actually have a good opinion of Parisians, BUT… also find them significantly more arrogant, aggressive, chauvinistic, snobbish, and self-centered than other French. If you can read French, check out the study, here.

During my time in Paris I’ve certainly witnessed my fair share of rudeness and bad attitudes, but I tend to write it off. For one, these people are living in the most visited city on earth, meaning that they are constantly dealing with tourists haphazardly wielding cameras and maps, asking them questions in foreign languages, clogging up their national monuments and perhaps would-be favorite restaurants that are now avoided due to crowding. And since I am already walking around with an apology at the ready to excuse me for my non-French fluency, the Parisians I encounter seem to take mercy (or pity) on me.

So although I haven’t been the victim of any outright acts of vehemence (knock on wood), I do appreciate when I notice the contrary: people being nice. And yesterday as I was preparing for my fourth trip to London in as many months, I was bestowed with the gift of politeness by not one, but an entire group of people.

It was a very early Tuesday morning for me, and I started my day by waiting in line at Gare du Nord train station to pick up my tickets for London. Having arrived early I was second in line, so my stress level remained low because I knew I’d be helped promptly. Or so I thought.

After more than half an hour in line (and half an hour closer to my train’s departure time), a security agent told all of us in the queue what I assume to be a new location to wait in a new line. Of course with my lack of French I was the last to catch on to his instructions, and therefore was the last to be standing in the new line. Starting to get panicky, I began going through my bag to find any and all documentation I might need to present to the ticket agent so that I could get what I needed and head to my train as fast as possible. At this point, I still needed to go through customs and security before boarding, and time was running out. Before I had time to realize exactly how close I was to potentially missing my train, I heard a rumble of conversation in front of me. Looking up, I see the entire line of people looking at me and waving me to the front of the line.

Regaining my spot as second in line, the man who was first turned to me and made a joke about travel-related stress. In French. The confused look on my face prompted him to ask “English?” and we began talking. He asked the usual questions – where are you from, where are you going, do you speak ANY French – and then proceeded to offer his help should I have any difficulty retrieving my tickets in English. Though I declined his offer, I couldn’t help but be struck by how a potentially nerve-wracking situation had turned into one of the best examples of kindness I had experienced in a long time.

The thought crossed my mind that maybe the man in front of me wasn’t Parisian. It’s very possible, of course, given that we were all in a train station heading to who-knows-where. But I think that at least one of those people in that long line at the ticket window was a local, and I’m happy enough with that. 🙂

48.868711 2.417708
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