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Browsing Category Speaking

Some things to tide you over

September 5, 2012 · by Nikki

Paradise? Kos? What’s the difference?

I have just arrived from a fantastic holiday on the island of Kos in Greece! I am busy adjusting to being back in the real world, and until I have time to actually write some decent posts, here are links to a few things that should provide good reading material in the meantime.

The amazing Mama over at HJ Underway wrote a post echoing my thoughts about speaking a language other than the local one, and the American language debate. Check it out, here.

My latest article for MyFrenchLife, talking about tennis in Paris, was published while I was away. You can read it, here.

Benny the super Irish Polyglot found my blog post about my addiction to excuses, and he posted it on his site, with some of his commentary (and EXCELLENT feedback in the comments for those of you looking to learn another language). Check out his site, here, and the blog where my addiction post makes an appearance, here.

Until next time! 😉

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Previous Post

August 21, 2012 · by Nikki

A post that has inspired me like few others…

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The International Language of Love

February 14, 2012 · by Nikki

Now that I’ve been inducted into the American Women Dating French Men Club (It’s true–this is a common phenomenon. The late Polly Platt even wrote a book about it, called Love à la Française, written specifically about the matchup between American women and French men), I am constantly asked about whether or not there are any differences in having a relationship with someone from another culture. The short answer: Heck yes!

The first, and most obvious difference is one I described in an earlier post: There was no pre-relationship dating period (or hoops to jump through, or games, or mind tricks, or silly moments where one begins to doubt the credibility of the feelings they’re forming, etc.).

But there are definitely other differences–some more subtle, while others tend to be obvious. As you might expect, most of the differences are related to methods of communication. While many American men tend to circumnavigate what they really want to say in an attempt to sidestep ANY negativity or tension (read: fights), French men tend to get right to the truth. This has its pros and cons:

Me: What do you think about this dress?

American: Yeah, sure, it’s nice. But what about that other one that you have? That one you just got last week?

French: No. Your skin is too pale to wear that color.

Me: Hey, do you want to go out with me and my friends this weekend?

American: Yeah! Sounds great (thinking: UGH)!

French: Not really, but I’ll come with you anyway.

In addition to differences in communication style, I’ve also noticed that certain activities appeal to one culture a lot less than to the other. For example:

Me: I need to go shopping. I want some cute boots!

American: Ugh. Okay.

French: Okay!  I know some good places we can go.

Me: Wow – these flowers are gorgeous!

American: Ummm… (thinking: Oh I get it. She’s trying to hint to me that I should buy her flowers.)

French: Yeah, they’re beautiful. Let’s get some!

What these examples do not take into account is the specific issue of language. It’s easy enough for two Americans to have misunderstandings when things don’t come out right, tone is mis-perceived, or words other than those that most accurately describe one’s thoughts and feelings are used. Imagine how tricky it can be to decipher all of this with someone who grew up with a different set of words all together?!

At the end of the day, I find that the differences and challenges I face while trying to adjust to a new set of relationship rules do NOT outweigh the happiness I’ve found. What amazes me most is that despite these differences between us, being happy with someone has never before been this easy. And the craziest part? Realizing that I traveled half-way across the world for a job after a chance meeting with the man who’s now my boss and discovered way more than just a new job and a new city. Serendipity at it’s finest, I think. 🙂

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I’ve Got Friends (That Were Once) In Low Places…

November 10, 2011 · by Nikki

Last night I attended a soiree organized by an online magazine dedicated to building a community of people who have some connection to France/the French in their lives (more to come on this in a future post).

In addition to meeting some really cool Australians, Americans and French people who are currently living in Paris, I got something really amazing out of this little shindig: Encouragement.

About to reach the six-month-mark of living here in Paris and still having only basic (though improving!) French, I often get down on myself for not having made more progress. I even wrote about it, here. And although I would argue that, among all the places in France to live, Paris is the easiest place to get by if you have only an elementary understanding of French, I expected more from myself on the language front by now.

When I arrived at last night’s event, I was unsure if I’d even be able to communicate with anyone, and was nervous that people would look down their noses at me for being a French resident who still speaks almost entirely in English. But on the contrary, I was met with a barrage of understanding and motivation! A lot of these people had come to France with little to no French training, and are now either speaking fluently or enough to communicate well in nearly every situation. And the kicker? It took them all about a year-and-a-half to get there.

“Six months?!” One woman said. “You’ve got to give yourself more time. There’s no way you could expect to be speaking a lot of French in only six months.”

“At around six months I thought I was speaking great French because I didn’t know it well enough to know the mistakes I was making. At one year I actually was more frustrated because I could hear my mistakes. Eventually you just have to stop caring and stop feeling embarrassed and it gets easier.”

I woke up this morning with a renewed sense of determination to tackle this language, and I’m grateful for the words of wisdom these fellow expats were able to share. Finding out that I’m not failing as hard as I thought I was: not a bad way to spend a Wednesday evening, eh? 🙂

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A Blast from the Past

March 11, 2011 · by Nikki

I’m a celebrity!

No I’m not. Not even close. BUT – A professor at my alma mater asked me a few weeks back if I’d be willing to come to Endicott and speak with undergrads about market research, my experiences in the industry, and generally share advice with the soon-to-be grads. So of course I said yes, and it was so much fun!

I was expecting the discussion to be rather lackluster, especially when I learned that today is the Friday before “spring break,” and clearly everyone would be thoroughly checked out. But, surprisingly, the kids paid attention, were interested in what I had to say, and asked a lot of questions. Nothing like people being in awe of your, and I quote, fabulous life to make you feel a little socialite-esque. 🙂

After the class, where I shared my experiences with qual and quant market research, some of the funnier moments I’ve had so far, the places I’ve gotten to travel to, and offered up some resume and career-starting advice, I had a great talk with the professor who asked me to possibly come and speak to some additional classes of hers. Peachy!

And did I mention that Endicott College is looking great these days? Being on campus re-instilled a pride in me that I haven’t felt about EC in a while. I’m happy to be involved as an alum, and hope my little 50 minutes of fame today helped some of these students in learning about a potential career path.

That’s it for now!

Ciao

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